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Take That, Theatremonkey

November 3, 2010

Sometimes you get in the way of a juggernaut and can’t avoid getting hit by it. Though Theatremonkey.com has always covered a few pop concert venues, it never has (and just can’t) cover the vast ones like Wembley Stadium.  That didn’t stop several thousand readers trying to find details last Friday… or just alternative phone numbers to get tickets to see Robbie, Gary and the gang next summer.

Unlike every other vast ticket selling site, the monkey one didn’t crash (Connie Fisher and Lee Mead’s records are intact), but the reader figure spike was more than noticeable.

Also popular; a year on, Amazon.co.uk were down to their last five copies of “Theatremonkey, A Guide To London’s West End” yesterday. Luckily, last night Mr P had a rummage around in his shed, and (when he’d finished doing that / been bailed from custody) told his warehouse to send them extra. Still, the stock can’t last for ever – now may be a good time to get your order in before the turkey bashing season.

I should point out to American readers that “Turkey Bashing” is 25th December in the UK, not “Thanksgiving.” We don’t have that – though I enjoy both gridiron games – those we do get. My point is: why did America give Halloween back to us? We had a perfectly good Autumn event – Guy Fawkes Night – that gave an unruly element a 50/50 chance of getting horribly disfigured by firework and bonfire accidents, rather than giving them100%  licence to run riot around the neighbourhood extorting cash and vandalising innocent people’s homes. Guy Fawkes suits the British temperament in the same way Halloween suits Americans. So, once we can get the ‘elf and safety wallies (clowns / doofusses – or is doofi the plural? / you get the picture USA) off our backs, can we have our festival back, please?

And just to round off, not sure about either change imminent in the West End. Andrew Lloyd Webber selling 4 theatres? Bit mad, but if the new owners spend a bit of cash and maybe invest in good online booking, I can live with it. The National Theatre Cottesloe auditorium becoming the Dorfman Theatre? Initially a bit upset, but then the Cottesloe is going to be extensively re-modelled anyway to make it a new theatre more or less, and Dorfman did give us the Travelex Season. Besides, if his first name was Saul, we could have great fun answering the phone… “Saul Dorfman” doesn’t half sound like a posh person telling somebody to “go away” in clear language, no?!

You have to feel sorry for the Cottesloe family losing their name on a theatre (but they will gain a café). I feel sorrier, though, for a friend who has just started a computer peripherals website with a medieval theme aimed at the male market (pictures of serving wenches with printers etc etc.) Suddenly, his domain name doesn’t sound half so clever… YeMeninkcartridges.com…

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